I thought I would write this blog to give you an insight to why I put this online personal training course together. For years I was never happy with my figure and I’ve tried many times looking at fitness programmes, also whats the best way to lose weight, different types of fat loss programmes, that have all been unsuccessful in reaching my goal weight. But what I was doing was looking at it as a view of what others wanted me to be, the way that society pictures that perfect hourglass figure, for me to have a good marriage and find my soul mate was to be perfectly toned with 0% body fat. Well, that’s not the sort of relationship advice I want to follow. I don’t want to have to be looking constantly at gym workouts and various diet plans, if I’m going to lose weight I don’t want it to be because that’s the only way I will have a good relationship with someone, I want to learn how to lose weight for me. So I researched and found lots of articles on how to lose weight for women and how to lose weight for men, but I found nothing that gave me the best weight loss I knew I could achieve. All I read was the best weight loss plan, and get your personal trainer, free diet plans online nothing that gave me what I wanted. My relationships with men were failing and I was blaming the fact that I couldn’t get slim to be the reason. I needed relationship advice, I’d take it from anyone, singles looking for love, married women wanting more from their husbands and married men getting it elsewhere and what they told me made me realise that no one was really happy. No one took the time out to learn about themselves and what they actually wanted. Of course, I want the perfect body, but at what price was I willing to go to get it. My health and fitness journey was taking control of my love life. I needed weight loss help but how can look after my relationship issues at the same time?
This made me alone and single for a long while, looking at dating sites and pitching myself at men out of my league, men who were buff, who were only into muscles and fitness. Thinking that they might rub off onto me, but instead, I found that they weren’t interested in me, but my body for the opposite reason, not because I wanted to be fit and healthy but because I wasn’t and I was an easy lay.
For years of my youth I enjoyed a promiscuous life but in return, it didn’t give me joy and that desire for a quick fix didn’t help me find love, I was a lonely heart or should I say my heart was lonely.
I got into my first long relationship which I thought I was happy, I had two children and gained weight, I gained 6 stone to be exact. I then became withdrawn, unhappy that I gained so much weight and didn’t know how or what to do. My partner had prying eyes and to my dismay, he proved my thoughts. Though 7 years of our relationship I have no idea to which years were actually given to me. I got sad but became strong. I said to myself ‘its time to take action with your weight’ I lost my weight through various slimming programmes and weight loss journals, in fact I remember writing down everything I ate and drank for almost a year of my life, I invested in home gym equipment, and I even walked to lose weight. I eventually got back to my target but never really got my soul back, I never felt that I could trust or love anyone ever again. I became lost in the view that I could only have one thing at a time, either a good body or a good husband. I searched online dating, and more bad relationships, which eventually got me down again to weight some of my weight snuck back on, but I realised that I was not proving anything to myself by doing this. I need to find happiness in who I am before anyone else can. My turning point was putting myself back into my work, remembering why I do what I do and what it means to help others. I used the promiscuous skills I had gained over the years to teach and train others in the how-to when it comes to sex, and I gained my confidence back, my love of people and what it feels like to like myself again. This was when I stumbled across the love of my life.
He accepted me the size and shape that I was. He supported the work that I did and he too wanted to shape up but in a healthy weight loss way. No more fad dieting, no more quick weight loss plans for me, I didn’t need to as he loved me for me. Now Two years into our relationship, we guide each other, through our own love advice, and our trust towards each other. I was almost feeling the place I’ve always dreamed of, but that last little piece felt missing. It was my body, having children, gaining and losing weight, the yo-yo effect had taken its toll on me. What could I do to improve me, create a new you (me) have the body I’ve always dreamed of, well I can tell you I’m not quite there yet but, I am on the right track, and the support I have is the most important thing I could ever wish for, and here’s why:
6 months ago, I spoke to my partner and told him that our life constraints don’t give us enough quality time together, I don’t feel as close as we did when we first met, I felt that my partner and I were distant and as someone who supports married couples and individuals with my work, how can I not be able to achieve this at home? I knew it was because I didn’t have enough time, not enough time to go the gym, not enough time to eat properly, not enough time for sleep, good quality sleep and that’s when it hit me.
I need to be able to lose weight with the support of my partner, I need to be part of something with my other half. Relationship counselling states that the more you do as a couple the stronger the relationship. I don’t want to go through any of my past relationship issues again, I want to find love, find my soul mate and for the first time in a long time, I now feel that. But how can I incorporate this into my life? I want to feel closer to my partner, feel love and be happy.
So this is where I wondered what can I do with my partner to lose weight, feel great and get closer as a couple. I had seen many online fitness programmes that show couples getting fit, but I was intimidated by how beautiful their bodies are, the thought of getting a beach body was wonderful but for me not realistic. I wanted something I could do no only in the gym but home exercise, I wanted to lose weight the natural way, and the most fun. I researched into sex and how many calories you burned but I wondered if you could use sex to target specific muscle groups getting toned quicker, by doing everyday exercises, and yes, yes you could doing sexercises!
So sexercise was born! No need for fancy gym equipment, no need for lifting weights hours a night, no need for an expensive personalised training course, we developed a programme that not only helped us lose weight, but gets toned, and get closer and more in love than ever before! No need for relationship therapy or any need for marriage guidance, I found a solution to all my problems all in one go. We put the course together and trialled the first 6 weeks, and boy we were delighted with the results. Over a stone in weight lost each and over 34inches! This is incredible! Knowing that something we do at home can be part of your very own fitness programme. No need to go to expensive gyms, you can work out to your own online fitness programme based on sex. It was a win-win for us and now I feel so much better. My search for a soulmate has ended, my search for quick weight loss has ended and my love for life has just begun.